Weaknesses
by Sanddobby
Summary: Nikolas wants to say it, but Aubrey doesn't want to hear it. The story is much better then the summary, i promise! Aubrey/Nikolas slash, rated R for sexual content. R+R pleeze!


Hey everybody! Grath here!  
  
Ok, Vampires are sexy. That's a fact we all know. Just the fact that they're vampires makes them sexy. I love vampires, and Aubrey is no exception. Aubrey is the sexiest, coolest, best vampire in the world, and I love him. The only other vampire that might rival him for downright sexiness and coolness is Nikolas. That's why I put this little slash together because it doesn't get any sexier then gay vampires. The only things that are sexier then a gay vampire are gay blond twin vampires... hehehe...Grath: Sorry, I kinda got off track there...  
  
Anyway, has anyone noticed that there is almost NO AAR slash out there? So, I decided to write some AAR slash of my own. Starting with this one.  
  
Anyway, this fic is based on the fact that in ITFOTN Risika says that love is a weakness. When I read that something kinda clicked. And here's the result. Hope you like it, even if it is a little short;)  
  
Warnings: My first sex scene, so it might be kinda bad. Nuthin to graphic, tho. Extreme angst, broken hearts, etc., also. Oh, and Aubrey/Nikolas slash.  
  
Disclaimer: Grath: I don't own him *points to Aubrey* or him *points to Nikolas*  
  
Aubrey: She doesn't own me*points to Grath* and I don't own him.  
*points to Nikolas*  
  
Nikolas: Neither of them own me *points to Aubrey and Grath* But I  
do own Aubrey *winks*.  
  
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Weaknesses  
  
By Grath Longfletch  
  
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~Don't tell me the bad news, Don't tell me anything. Just tell me that you need me, And stay right here with me...  
-Good Charlotte  
  
~Help me! I think I'm falling in love with you...  
- Joni Michel  
  
(Aubrey POV)  
  
It's dark. It's so dark that I can barely see anything. But I don't need to see. I can feel and hear and smell and taste everything that is happening around me, happening to me. I can feel you, your hands, your tongue, your lips, roaming over my body, touching, tasting, eliciting moans and gasps from the back of my throat. There is no need for timid exploration. You know my body like you know your own, and your hands are steady and confident. Your smell is all around me, intoxicating me. I'm drowning in it, drowning in you. I'm drowning and I don't really mind because it's you and the smell of you and the feel of your hands and the taste of your lips on mine and the sound of your sighs and gasps and moans breaking the silence of the night, mingling with my own voice.  
  
I can taste your skin now. You always tasted so good during sex, like cinnamon and salt and the air before a storm. I will never be able to get enough of this, enough of you. I'm addicted to you, so hopelessly addicted that eventually I'll get sent to rehab to get off you and then I'll come back, and I'll see you, and you'll say something to me along the lines of "Hello," and I'll be addicted all over again. That's what you do to me.  
  
We're moving together now, two bodies moving as one, straining to find release. I love being inside you. You close around me like a tight, warm fist, pleasuring me to no end. Sighs turn to pants and moans turn to shouts as we move faster, closer to the edge. And suddenly I've reached the brink, and I'm falling, calling your name, hearing your voice calling mine as we reach completion together.  
  
And then it's over. The last sounds of our voices float off into the night, and the room descends into silence. We lie still on the bed, for I cannot find the strength left in me to move. There is no sound at all. That is one thing I miss about being human. The sound of your lover's breathing after making love. The sound of another's heartbeat next to your ear. I cannot help but miss it.  
  
I pull away from you now, and lie beside you, gazing at your pale face, stroking your silky black hair, drenched with sweat, out of your eyes. You smile at me, and I all but melt inside. Your smiles do that to me. They completely undo me. You lean over to me, your smiling lips hovering over my ear, evidently to whisper something. Warning bells go off in my head.  
  
Please don't say it. Please...  
  
"I..."  
  
Oh god, Nikolas, please don't say it. You can't...  
  
"...love you, Aubrey."  
  
You say it. You shouldn't have said it. You shouldn't have fallen in love with me. You shouldn't have fallen in love at all.  
  
Love is a weakness.  
  
Now I have to hurt you. I have to break your heart. The only other choice is for me to succumb to the weakness. And I will not be weak. When you are a vampire, if you are weak then you will die. And I will not die. I don't want to hurt you, Nikolas, but you leave me no choice. I turn my head away from you. I can't look at you as I do this.  
  
"Nikolas, Niki, I'm sorry, but..."  
  
What will you do when I tell you? How will you react? Will you explode, yelling at me about how I led you on, and how I only saw you as an object, a pretty item for me to use at my will? Or will you be all right with it, and allow us to go on as we were, content with having my body but not my heart?  
  
"...I don't love you."  
  
I brace myself for what is to come. When I hear no sound, I turn to look at your face. I was wrong in both my assumptions. You are only staring at me, your eyes wide, with a look of extreme disbelief behind them.  
  
"Niki, I'm so sorry. It's just that..."  
  
I sigh, and search for the right words inside my head.  
  
"...I just can't love you. I like you, I really do. I just don't love you."  
  
Oh god, you're starting to cry. Silent tears are running one after the other down your cheeks, soaking the pillow under your head.  
  
"Oh Niki, please don't cry. It isn't that there's something wrong with you..."  
  
I make a vain attempt to calm you, but you hold up a hand to quiet me.  
  
"I think I should go now."  
  
You are speaking softly, so quietly I can barely hear you. You turn your beautiful, tearstained face away from me, and I see you pull yourself up and out of the bed. I can hear you moving around the darkened room, pulling on your jeans, and then your shirt, discarded on the floor hours ago when we first entered the room. All the while, I lie still on the tangled bed sheets, and I can feel my heart cracking in my chest. And I know that I did this. It is my fault, my stupid pride and I.  
  
You open the door, and light from the hallway outside floods the room, silhouetting your slender form in the doorway. Music from the nightclub, Los Noches, at the end of the hallway, floats to my ears. I slide up out of the bed, reaching a hand out toward your back as if I could take hold of you and pull you back into my embrace.  
  
"Niki, please don't go...I'm sorry, I really am..."  
  
"Aubrey, I don't want your apologies. Goodbye."  
  
You step out of the doorway, and the door swings shut with a click behind you. I cannot believe it. You are gone. I spin quickly around and slam my clenched fist against the wall, letting out a strangled cry of frustration. My fist crashes through the weak plaster of the wall, creating a sizable hole. I feel hated tears stinging the back of my eyes.  
  
I love you, Niki. I love you.  
  
I stand in silence for what seems like hours, tears pouring freely from my eyes, my hand aching from its assault on the wall. I cannot believe what I have just done, to you, to myself. I should have told you. I could have told you to keep it between us, and no one else would know, so no one would be able to play upon my love for you to hurt me.  
  
No. No, it would never work.  
  
I shake the tears away, banishing all traces of sadness from my face and all thoughts of regret from my mind. Yes, I do love you. But you can never know that. No one can ever know that. What I did was for the best.  
  
Love is a weakness. And I refuse to be weak.  
  
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Ok, that's it. I would really appreciate it if u would e-mail me some feedback (sanddobbby@aol.com) and tell me what you thought of it. Especially the sex scene. That was my first sex scene, as I said before, and I would like to no what u peeps though of it. I was thinking that I might be able to continue and make a "Weaknesses" series, or at least a sequel, so if u peeps want that u can let me no.  
  
Luv ya all!  
  
Grath 


End file.
